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Insights into Love from the Built-In Intelligence of Life

This morning I woke, with a really profound excitement for the intelligence of life.  Whilst I’ve had a really tough-feeling few weeks, I can’t help but notice how the universe really does always have our back, even when it doesn’t feel like it!

 

Attempting to Work Love Out

For the last few weeks, I have been trying to make sense of ‘love’ and what it really is.  In moments, I just didn’t understand how love works anymore.  It feels as though there have been many issues in lots of my relationships recently, and there have been moments where it felt like love was missing, or love made no sense, or love was confusing, or that love was commitment, love was running away, or love was pain, or love was simply being alive – there was an experience of love from many different perspectives, moment to moment.  During all of this, I really tried to delve into what ‘love’ really meant, almost trying to define it and work it out!  What a task for something so huge, hey!  My conclusion was that love is potentially all of these things; love just is.  That might make no sense, but I have a felt experience of what I mean.  I guess my point is that love is underneath everything.  And there almost lay more confusion!  Because if love is everything and everywhere, what is our true experience of love?  I couldn’t quite explain it…  Until I had an insight.

 

The Divine Intelligence of Symbiotic Partnerships in Nature

I was chatting to a lovely colleague, Jenny Anderson (from Freedom Thinking) and she was talking about the fact that there are rodents (Agoutis) that collect and break into brazil nuts, bury them and then often forget where they are buried and so another brazil nut tree grows.  Without this specific rodent, which is the only rodent that can break into the nut, there would be absolutely no brazil nut trees!  What she (and I!) loved about this was how well this natural symbiotic partnership really clearly shows us that there is a divine intelligence to life that we just can’t figure out!  We have no idea how that relationship happens, but there is something that makes it work, and allows brazil nuts to exist!

 

Something Greater: The Intelligence of Life

In the same way, there is something much greater than us that is always guiding us, and this means that we just can’t figure out some things, just like we can’t work out that symbiotic relationship in nature.  All we can do is let the universal intelligence of life figure things out, and trust.

There is nothing to do – though this doesn’t mean that we ‘do nothing’; we live.  But we get a balance between living and allowing, staying in our moment-to-moment aliveness, whilst remembering that life is also living us.  And so, there are just some things that can’t be worked out immediately; there is nothing to work out, but things will work out.  When we allow this, clarity can come within the space we free up by not trying to analyse things.

 

Just Live and Let Life Work It Out

And so, in that space, where I freed up some of my thinking about love, I let life happen and work it out for me, even when it makes no sense to.

My message in this short post is just that we should live, enjoy our experience of being alive – and all the ups and downs that gifts us – and let life’s underlying intelligence work out the things you can’t.  That’s all we can do.  And, sometimes, that seems like the answers appear in a less timely way than you might like, but that is life’s plan, and all you can do is go with it.

Have a lovely day.

Namaste,

 

 

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How to Face Uncertainty: Why We Don’t Need to Press the Panic Button

I’m super excited to share my latest feature on Tiny Buddha blog, which is all about uncertainty.  I have had an extremely uncertain week, and so it feels really synchonistic to me today that this is when it has been published.

Here it is, check it out by clicking on the link below:

If you’re interested in chatting further with me, do get in touch!

Namaste,

 

 

How would you respond if you knew your wellbeing wasn’t dependent on others?

 

I woke up with this insightful question this morning.  I’ve spent the past week (or you could argue three years) feeling every-so-slightly-restless, wanting something external to change, expecting life to be ever-so-slightly different and, perhaps – whilst I didn’t always think I was – putting the responsibility for my happiness onto others.

Three years ago I experienced a trauma that felt like it turned my life upside-down; I lost family who told me I was no longer ‘part of them,’ and that they didn’t like me.  I found myself feeling disconnected, lonely, anxious and depressed.  Ever since all of that, I seemed to be on a journey to try and ‘re-find’ myself.  I remember once really resonating with the phrase “you don’t know this new me; I put my pieces back together differently,” as I found myself booking the next flight to Bali alone, exploring the globe looking for answers as to why I wasn’t enough, and why I felt so broken.

At the time, it really felt that my wellbeing was wholly dependent on all of these other people.  And yet, what I didn’t realise was that the answers – the truths – were actually always innately within.  One day, along my path, I heard something profoundly different in a conversation about life with a wellbeing mentor, and it completely turned it all round for me.  What I heard was was I now call Transformational Truth: we are only who we ‘think’ we are, and all of our feelings are entirely constructed by our own thinking, which we live in the feeling of, moment to moment.  Furthermore, clarity about the ‘truth’ is underneath all of this thought!

Realising that I wasn’t who others thought

In this, I heard something a little deeper; that if we are who we think we are, we aren’t who others think we are.  Because, ultimately, we are never actually in relationships with others, we are only ever in relationships with our ‘thinking’ about others.  This totally made sense to me (when it sunk in on a deeper level) as it explained why, actually, none of what others thought about me even mattered, because it wasn’t truth.

It’s all within you

Not only that but what you see in others, is actually what is in you.  I realised that I began to attribute the beauty I saw in others to them, but it was actually also in me.  For example, my love of depth and exploration was all mine; yet I saw that as being something others had, that I wanted.  As I began to see that it was just thought that it was in others, I began to step out into the world as who I was underneath all the thinking about who I wasn’t: a deep explorer!

Our true nature is wellbeing

Whenever I was in a low feeling mood, I would sit and think about how to fix it.  I would sit and think ‘I want this’ and I would often feel powerless to achieve it.  But, suddenly, as I learned more about the nature of what it is to be a human experiencing ‘thought’, all of this began to drop away.  When we see that our true nature is wellbeing and happiness, and that we are just experiencing our thinking all of the time, it all begins to make more sense.  Underneath all of our thought storms, we are who we were born as: whole and perfect.

We are always where we need to be: being universally guided

The other thing I heard was that we are all guided by a universal energy, which we are all part of.  Underneath all of our thinking about everything, there is a guiding force that we can trust enough to just let everything go.  Not only does this mean that we can never be ‘disconnected’ as we are all part of ‘one’ greater force, but we are always exactly where we need to be in each moment, even when it doesn’t always make sense to us.  Whenever we hit a challenge, like I did, it facilitates growth and deeper understanding about the world which helps life make much more sense.

Making sense of life: the wisdom underneath the illusion of form

What I realised, as my thoughts dropped away, was that my wellbeing was never dependent on someone else.  After years of searching, I came into my own wisdom as soon as I simply understood more about how life really works. Now I’m lucky because I get to share this wisdom with others.

Recently, as I felt restless, I knew to do something different.  Instead of looking to change the external as I might have done three years ago, I took a moment to inquire into my own thinking.  Rather than looking at the illusion of ‘form’ – the external human experience that felt like it could impact me – I dived inwards.  Seeing my thoughts as little bubbles of energy, floating around, I questioned why I was restless.  Insight dropped into my head that I was expecting for something to be different to how it was.  In that expectation, it really felt like my wellbeing was impacted.  It felt like I needed something to change.  I cried a little, I ran around the lake, I journaled (a lot!), and then I sat in non-action and let it all happen.  At one time, I would have reached out and tried to force the thing I wanted changing; I’d have tried to fix the external.  I would have got caught up in trying to figure out what was ‘wrong’ with me, analysing why nothing was ‘right,’ and spent all of my energy trying to force the unforceable.

This time, I just simply noticed all of these thoughts, and I sat in the discomfort of the feelings that they crafted.  I waited for it to pass, knowing that it would, because thoughts are always transient, and none of them are true.  And then, I remembered my innate wellbeing and resilience.  I noticed; instead of responding to life from a place of being dependent on the external, I knew that my wellbeing was already constant.  Underneath all of my thinking about who I was in relation to everything and everyone out there, I knew that my wellbeing was all within me.   And in that moment, I thought “how would you respond if you knew your wellbeing wasn’t dependent on others?” – and I wrote this, from the beautifully creative space that was opened up which was no longer filled with ‘what if?’  I’m not saying it always feels comfortable when you see it is just the nature of your thoughts, but what does happen is you spend less time worrying about them, and free up creative space for something beautiful.  When we can respond from a place of knowing we are always ok, no matter what, we see the truth that the whole universe is always working in our perfectly whole favour.

In that knowing, you respond differently to life!

Namaste,

 

 

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Stepping Curiously into Perceived Pain: How to Show Up

 

It is often in our discomfort where we learn the most.  Not embedded in it, as if it were permanent, but a gentle tiptoeing into the waters, curiously dancing in the painful feeling of it, knowing we can walk right back out at any time we like.

 

The Transient Illusion of Pain

It’s in the ‘not facing’ it where the real pain illusion lies, because that is where we feel stuck.  Of course we’re not stuck, because we never can be.  It’s only ever a thought that we are ‘stuck’ anywhere, even when it feels like our emotions can engulf us, swallowing us into a dark messy hole.  Why?  Because we are constantly living in the feeling of our thinking, moment to moment – and whilst things can seem so real, they are always a transient illusion.

 

Understanding How Life Really Works

You see, we are spiritual beings, in human bodies living a human experience of our human thinking.  In this human form, we are blessed with the creative power of thought.  We were born whole and perfect, and then somehow, along the way, we learned to forget this bliss and think differently about life!  At any point, though, we can return to this remembrance of the truth of who we really are, just by seeing that as the nature of life.

And so, when we begin understand more about the truth of how life really works in this way, it becomes ok to step curiously into the painful feelings, knowing that we are always ok underneath them.  What’s more, is that even in our painful feelings – often of separation, or whatever our illusion may be – if we can remember that underneath everything we are all love, then we can settle, and see the world differently.  We are never separate because we are part of the whole – the greater, universal energy; it’s just a temporary human illusion.

 

Stay Curious About the Thought-Created Reality

I’m not advising to sit in the painful feelings and wallow.  I’m advising to stay curious about them.  Delve into what is underneath them.  Because we see our world from our own thought-created reality, everything we see is a creation of our own mind.  Where we might see someone leaving us as painful, it might be because we feel our thinking that we are ‘abandonable;’ and yet we aren’t, because not only is there no real separation, but we are whole and perfect, and live in pure love.  When we can only see that we are abandonable, it tells us that we are seeing the world through ‘abandonable’ thinking.  When we don’t trust ourselves to commit, it tells us that we are seeing the world through untrustworthy, incapable thinking.  It will all pass.  There is not anything to do; but there is something to learn.

Time and time again I have felt ‘abandoned’ thinking in this human world.  I constantly dip in and out of feeling my thinking that people will leave.  I never really realised this, until I sat in the pain and dived into the waters.  There would have been a time where I’ve simply stayed in this space of pain, feeling sorry for myself that I’d been ‘abandoned’ again.  But, one day, when I heard something different about how life really works – when I heard the wisdom I’m sharing today – it changed my world.

Instead of looking into the content of the form, I looked underneath, to the formless.  I questioned why it hurt so much that I had been left.  Underneath all of it was my own thinking that I was unworthy, that I was ‘leaveable,’ helpless, and that I really truly believed this was part of my story – that this was ‘me.’  And then, I realised there was no ‘me;’ that there is only us.  And if ‘I’ don’t exist, then none of the feelings I feel in my separation can exist either.  They are all a figment of my beautifully creative thinking.  As I dipped my toes into information in the feelings, staying curious about life via thought in the moment, my thinking became less powerful and started to drop away.  What happens then, is we allow space.

 

Find Truthful Wisdom in the Space

And, my beauties, it is in the space where our innate wisdom and truth lies.  Underneath all of this illusionary thinking, is where we can fully show up in the present moment, as the truthfully whole and perfect energy we are.  It is this space in which we can step right into our power.  We can own our feelings; we can become more of who we really are.  When we realise that we are already our truth, we are already whole and perfect, exactly as we are – and that any thought that we ‘aren’t’ is just thought – we can sit in the world, and our painful illusions, exactly as we are, knowing that we are exactly where we need to be, and we are always ok, no matter what.

I wrote this poem:

 

Distractions, we put in place to divert us from our pain. 

And, yet, years on, and it’s all still there with just one thought. 

Feeling too much to face, even still, in our thought storm. 

So we settle, back into our human illusion, waiting for the truth to come to us.

When we, already, are the truth.

 

When we know that we are already the truth, and that everything else is a temporary illusion, we evolve.  We step into life and allow all its beauty to shine from within us.  We realise we are life.  We live our truth!  We show up!  So, I dare you – go forth and dip your toes in, dance with the illusions and find your way back to your personal power.

You are perfect; stop waiting!

Infinite love,

 

 

 

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Trust Your Heart: Having Time Feature

The beautiful team over at HavingTime.com invited me to share an impactful story on their wonderful digital story magazine recently – and so, I’m excited to share it with you now!

For insight into how to connect with your inner wisdom in order to trust your heart, have a little read by clicking on the feature link below:

 

I hope you enjoy!  And a huge thanks to the gorgeous Lesya for the sharing of my message.  It’s so lovely to connect with beautiful humans!

Namaste,

 

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How to Find Your Way Back Home When You Don’t Know Where To Look

 

“While the mind sees only boundaries, love knows the secret way there.” ~ Rumi

 

Over the last few weeks I’ve been feeling a bit ‘out of sorts’.  There were a few ‘external’ seeming reasons for this – I finished a course, and then went travelling around England, before returning to a heap of work, giving myself no real space to just ‘be’; to settle.  It really felt like all of these things contributed to what felt as just ‘odd’, and all I wanted to do was find my way back to that feeling of peace that I have known so well at times!

 

Feeling Lost

Part of the challenge, it seemed, was that I had high expectations of what I ‘should’ be doing, and so I felt restless, like I wasn’t really achieving what I was meant to, and then I started to listen to other people’s ideas about what I should be doing, too.  It seemed I was trying to fit myself into a box of boundaries (like Rumi says, above).  I’ve finished learning, so I ‘should’ be working hard, right?!  Not only that, but because there was so much change going on, and little grounding, it felt like I actually forgot who I was.  I began to live in the illusion that I had ‘lost my power,’ I would say ‘yes’ to most things, and it really felt that I wasn’t ‘enough’ as I was.  In that moment, I forgot who I truly was; I forgot to love myself.

 

Finding Myself In the Basement

So, I’ve bumbled along like this for the last month, riding up and down in an elevator of moods, and perhaps spending a lot more time in the basement than I’d have liked.  It’s dark down there, and it feels messy, boring, uncomfortable, frustrating and, at times, depressing!  But, this week, I found myself back up nearer the top, seeing the clarity!  I know, now, that it will completely shift, and that there’s learning in the messiness.

 

How Did I Find My Way Back?

Well, I know it seems preferable to have a logical, step-by-step process as an answer, but life doesn’t really fit inside a little box.  That was part of the problem: I almost wanted it to, and I think that’s also a message that is reinforced in our human society!  It would be so easy if we could fit everything into a prescription of ‘control;‘ but it would also take away some of the fun of having absolutely no idea what is in store. At the time, I would have given anything for someone to tell me how to work my way out of it; but the reality is, it will pass all by itself.

What’s interesting is that I suddenly started to feel I had no boundaries.   I was saying ‘yes’ to everything, crowing all of my space with projects and movement, and actually doing some things that I didn’t really love to do.  I was beginning to look externally, to others, or to fix situations, for answers, feeling I needed support or agreement from other people.  Someone told me I ‘needed boundaries’ and I began to worry that I needed to be stronger!

 

Thinking about Boundaries: Remembering My Own Voice

Then I remembered to listen to myself.  Whilst we feel a certain temptation at times to love rules – there’s a certain comfort in stability – I am a bit of a maverick; I love freedom, I love expansiveness, I love creativity.  In fact, I don’t believe there are any boundaries other than those created our own thoughts.  So, actually, I remembered that my ‘lack of boundaries’ is actually not a bad thing at all – whilst I might seem overly laid back, or too open, to some, to me, it’s the beauty of my ability to be creative!  For a second, all that happened was that I had dropped into ‘Boundary World’ – just until I realised that such a place didn’t even exist – and that I don’t really want to live in a ‘boundaried’ world at all.

I realised, it is not actually ‘bad’ to be ‘boundary-less’ (and that ‘good’ and ‘bad’ don’t really exist as they are also labels and boxes!) but, instead it is amazingly freeing!  In a world with no boundaries (which is actually all there is outside of our minds), there is infinite possibility, and we don’t need any expectations, other than to live in the moment and create from there.  In the moment I heard this wisdom kicking in, I also remembered that we just need to love ourselves enough to HEAR our own wisdom, and stop listening to the external and dive within, into our own beauty.

In remembering that, is how we return home – just with that little bit of insight.  The only person you need to hear is yourself.  In self-love, of who we really are, and remembering that we are enough, is where the answer is truly found.  It is all within.

 

We Are Already Home

You see, actually, even when you don’t know where to look to find a way back to a ‘settled’ feeling space, life will take you back there, even if you don’t think it will!  In fact, that space is all there ever is.  The label of being unsettled is only the same as the label of needing boundaries.  When it seems like something is permanent, it isn’t – it’s an illusion!  There is infinite and unlimited abundance and space.  Everything we feel comes directly from our thinking.  If we are experiencing low mood thoughts, then we will experience low mood feelings.  If we are experiencing lost thinking, then we will feel lost.  If we experience thinking that there is a box, we will feel that there is a box. That’s all it is.  There is no box, there is no lost.  There is only perfect wholeness; and, when we are at the top of the elevator, this is what we see – the clarity and the truth.  There is nothing to do, but wait until we reach the top again, to self-enquire into the nature of our thinking, and to allow ourselves to beautifully unfold.

Listen to yourself, love yourself, and the answers will arrive.

With love and gentle reminders,

 

 

 

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Tiny Buddha Feature

I’m super excited to share that my latest post has been featured on the Tiny Buddha blog!  I just want to express my absolute gratitude to the beautiful Lori Deschene who worked with me on allowing my wisdom to be heard on her amazing site.  It has been so lovely to be able to share with so many of you.

If you missed seeing it, you can find it here:

 

Why I Stopped Trying to Fix Myself and How I Healed by Doing Nothing

Why I Stopped Trying to Fix Myself and How I Healed by Doing Nothing

I hope you enjoy the read, and do have a browse around Tiny Buddha’s site as it’s so full of wisdom that I love and I’m sure you’ll resonate with, too!

I am looking forward to soon writing more blogs to share – keep your eyes peeled!

Namaste,

 

 

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Living Life Purposefully – a ‘q&a’ with Jessica Huie, Author of ‘Purpose’

 

It continues to amaze me every day just how the universe works such magic.  I recently connected with the most beautiful being, Jessica Huie – entirely by chance, I might add.  I had enquired about one of her workshops, and later found an email whooshing inquisitively into my inbox about our mutual love of writing.  We instantly bonded over our similar missions to lead the conscious awareness of people, empowering them to step into the realisation of their truth – and from there we stepped into the realm of possibility to co-create this blog for you.

And so, I found myself reviewing her latest book – ‘Purpose’ – and offering the gems of insights from our connected conversation, in the form of a Q&A below.  It struck me, as I heard in the book that the universe connects people, in this moment, the universe aligned me with Jessica to fill my heart with joy and hope – and hopefully to do the same for my readers!

 

Jessica’s Understanding: Telling the Truth about Our Purpose

‘Purpose’ is a book that tells the truth.  For me, it aligned with my own knowing that we are not broken, we can all connect with our truth, and that we can all embrace our calling; but there was so much innate wisdom that unfolded within the pages.  This book had me – in different moments – both in absolute stiches of laughter, contrasting with rolling tears of empathy as I shared Jessica’s journey.  She is a real inspiration, and I really loved the way she shared her insights so eloquently.

Not only this, but there is a repeating pattern of generosity that beams throughout Jessica’s entire being – and that shines through each page.  When I first chatted with Jessica, her email was warm; I felt a real sense of an ‘offering’ of an opportunity, and of her holding open a door to me, just as she introduces in her first chapter that her health visitor had for her.  She is a beautiful soul; it is clear that Jessica wants to speak to the hearts of those on similar journeys – those with high hopes of embodying their purpose – and Jessica truly embodies everything her book stands for.  For that, there was so much gratitude as I reviewed this inspirational read.

For those of you who haven’t read ‘Purpose,’ please do (you can buy it HERE).  There were so many realisations that I resonated with – the truth that we are not broken; the fact that our stories don’t matter; ideas that there is nothing really to do to really ‘awaken,’ other than answer the call to be brave enough to leap in order to become who we really are – and the idea that all we need is already within, and that we just need to step into it and use our voice because once we do there is infinite possibility…

 

My Understanding of How Life Works

I am a woman with a similar purpose, because I became conscious of how life really works in this way, much along the same trail (I even visit Inner Space at Covent Garden just the same)!  I have resonated with feelings of ‘not being enough,’ being ‘alone’ and of ‘striving for more’ at times, and like Jessica says, I still dip in and out of this – as we all do.  The difference is, these days I know that I am absolutely whole and perfect at the truthful core, underneath all of the noise!

In my own ‘awakening’ to the truth, I discovered that not only is there a divine universal energy guiding us, meaning we are all ‘one’ and, therefore, always connected (namaste!), but that there is nothing to do to awaken to this because it is just the truth; when we understand how life works, our thought begins to drop away, leaving the truth.

How, you ask?  Within our human experience, we operate from our thinking, which we are living in the feeling of, moment to moment.  Whatever we think is just ‘thought’ in the moment, with no capacity to impact us, because it is not the truth; the real truth sits underneath, and we can get clarity at any time, just by letting go of our thinking.  As Jessica says – “truth has a way of cutting through the noise.”

The real truth is that we are already whole and perfect.  We are already our purpose; we might just not see if it is clouded by our thinking and so it feels like we need to step into it, but we just need to let go of the noise in order to step out.  Our reality comes from our inside-out thought creation – and, in this way, all we need to do is see our thinking for what it is and remember our true nature is our purpose.

               

Hearing One Truth in Many Different Ways

I heard all of this in Jessica’s book – and yet it was described in different ways.  For me, it just takes hearing something differently, in a way that you can really hear it – in your heart.  That’s all that happened to me to arrive at the same truth as Jessica: you just hear something in a meaningful way to you, which resonates.  So, if you feel like you’ve not yet heard that you are already whole and perfect – that you are already your purpose – give Jessica’s book a read!

 

A Different Conversation about Finding Your Purpose – with Nicole Barton and Jessica Huie

Nicole: Q

Thanks for sharing with us Jessica!  Firstly, I am amazed how people hear the same thing in different ways.  You said in our first email discussion that it astounds you how people have different journeys but seem to arrive at the same destination and understanding of life.  That’s certainly true from me, reading your book, as I can resonate with it all.  Why do you think this might be?
Jessica: AI think there is one universal truth, which resides within us. The way that many of us arrive back at that truth is varied, but ultimately truth is truth and so when we experience it the power of it has a gravitas which makes it unquestionable. We don’t believe it, we know it to be the truth. It’s a coming home of sorts.
  
Nicole: QThat’s lovely – I agree.  I also love that you said there wasn’t one thing that you can solely attribute your spiritual shift to.   For me, I think this is because peace is within us all along – as it is our true nature – and we just heard something different when we became curious about how life really works.  How far would you agree?
Jessica: A

 

Yes I agree the peace within us is our natural state. Our route back there, to where we began, is dictated by the choices we make, the experiences we have along our life’s journey. The more we move away from our intuitive knowing through our lives, the further we venture from that place of peace. Which is why being who we are – doing the right and truest thing, even when it feels the most difficult thing – is so important. We can’t see the peace which lies ahead when we are making the leap from where we have been to where we belong – and it often feels a winding and challenging road, but that courage, that commitment to our highest self, is what will take us into that shift and ultimately back to our innately loving state.
  
Nicole: QYou put that so beautifully!  One thing I heard from the book is that we have the power to ‘choose’ a new way of perceiving everything that has happened to us.  I personally hear something slightly different; I wonder whether it is not so much about an active process of ‘changing’ how we think about things, as much as seeing that we do ‘perceive’ (think) things and allowing those thoughts to pass through and drop away.  Is it the reality that we are whole and perfect underneath all of our stories, but that we just don’t see it – more of a return to the truth, than a new way of being?  As you say, we are not broken, and there is nothing to fix; so is there anything to change?
Jessica: A

 

Yes I like your train of thought! :0)  Depending on where we are on this journey, intellectually recognising there is a choice is a progressive first step which brings immediate relief.
  
Nicole: QI love that.  I see your reference to ‘intellectually’ recognising it.  As a mentor, I see people often worrying and over-thinking about what their purpose is.  What one bit of advice would you give to those ‘seeking to find’ their purpose who feel that they don’t yet know what it is?   Likewise, your personal purpose has been huge, and I see that some people may feel they ‘should’ have a big, world-changing, purpose – what would you say to those whose authentic purpose feels ‘smaller’?  What if our purpose is enough to just be alive?  In fact, do we always need a purpose to validate ourselves, or can we just exist?  How do you feel about the idea that we are always already living out our purpose, even if we think we aren’t?
Jessica: A

 

I believe that our purpose is to be who we are. To return to our true peaceful, loving and connected state. To become our highest selves, the actions we carry out (or don’t) in the world and the magnitude of them is not what it’s about. It’s about who we are for the world, not what we do – and if we are being love then we are living in purpose.
  
Nicole: QI adore that: our purpose is to be who we are!  Yes!  I heard a real sense of responsibility in you for helping the world awaken, which I totally resonate with as that’s my purpose, too.  I just wondered how far you feel that comes from the sense of the feeling of ‘struggle’ you mentioned at times?  Does it feel like a fight to make the world a more awakened, kinder place, or does it come from somewhere else?  From my own understanding, I see that we are all always ok, even when we think we aren’t.  It’s like I just forget that we can be able to respond, but don’t have to be responsible for making everyone see the truth.  However, when I’m in my thinking about wanting to change the world, it can feel I’m responsible for it!
Jessica: A

 

My personality is naturally one of leadership, I’ve been that way since childhood, rallying younger children into performances to raise school funds even at age 7 J Equally my experiences moulded me into a fixer’ with an overdeveloped sense of responsibility which I have to be mindful of for my own self-preservation.  Many other people were, and continue to be, instrumental in my journey to peace so whilst I now recognise that it is not our journey to fix others, I believe that if we can support, help or even spark a new view in somebody just by being who we are, then that in itself is being love.  It’s a dance which I think we all learn as we go.  I trip often :0)
  
Nicole: QI so admire your loving openness.  Your creativity is clearly also a huge talent.  I am also creative and it occurs to me that this probably makes us create great ‘thought-stories’ in our heads!  How far do you think this affects our ability to see our true purpose?
Jessica: A

 

Fascinating question. Perhaps its two pronged. Creativity at its best stems straight from our soul, our truth where purpose dwells, so operating from this space is us at our optimum. It’s when we disconnect from this space that we can get stuck in our head.
  
Nicole: QYou talked a lot about ‘doing’ things; like “crafting” new identities, “choosing new thoughts” or “meditating.”  Personally, I see that the external can’t really impact us because our identity is only a thought about who we are, we can’t control our thinking (even the positive thoughts), and peace is within, not outside.  I wonder how far we actually need an ‘identity’ label, if we can just observe our thoughts and know they will pass and reveal the truth of our wholeness underneath, and whether we meditate because it simply resonates with our hearts and so we feel more settled ‘thinking’?  Do you think there is anything to ‘do’ if we are already truthfully whole, and what implications does that have for living our purpose?
Jessica: A

 

Meditating is one route back to us, not something to do.  It’s a state of being.  Purpose is ultimately an invitation to question.  Question our habits, our identity, and if it is aligned with who we really are and explore new choices and ways of being in order to reconnect with our joy!
  
Nicole: QI love how you put that.  I totally love the openness to staying curious and learning more!  That’s why I loved your book.  So, my final question is how can people work with you?  I would love to connect deeper with you in order to help spread our similar message about how to reconnect people to the truth of who they really are.  Is there a way that people can do this?
Jessica: A

 

Information about my workshops and one to one work with clients who want to embrace visibility in an authentic purpose driven way, is all on my website www.JessicaHuie.com.
Nicole: Q Thank you, so much Jessica.  I have loved connecting with you and learning more; I am so grateful for your open heart in sharing your purpose with us. 

To end, some gorgeous insight just popped into my head from this experience: the fact that this lovely connection happened and that the universe opened this door, quite by chance, speaks to me that we are already living in our purpose.  The same goes for everyone reading it; follow your heart and the door will open.  Thank you for this learning.

Namaste,

 

 

 

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About Jessica Huie MBE

Jessica Huie MBE is an entrepreneur and the Author of PURPOSE, Find your Truth and Embrace your Ealling, published by Hay House. Jessica enjoyed a glittering career as a journalist and publicist, and has worked with some of the world’s biggest stars and business people, including Samuel L. Jackson, Hilary Devey & Meghan Markle.

Labelled one of Britain’s Most Inspiring Entrepreneurs by the Evening Standard. Jessica sits on Glamour’s Power List as one of the UK’s most influential women and was honoured with an MBE for entrepreneurship and her contribution to diversity.  Today Jessica works one-to-one with courageous female entrepreneurs through a three- month intensive programme to build their purpose driven brand and up-level their lives.

In Purpose, Jessica shares the lessons she learned as she went from being an individual who felt purposeless and unhappy, to someone who recognises her complete power to design and create a successful, meaningful and limitless life, built from an authentic foundation. Using the tools Jessica shares, you too will feel empowered to get unstuck, begin making real change in your own life and the lives of others and live according to your own true PURPOSE.  Click here to buy it.

Your Healthy Living Magazine Feature

We are excited to share our latest tips, featured in Your Healthy Living Magazine.  We were asked to provide advice about the best natural ways to tackle stress, so – of course – we pointed to the return to truth…  Have a read here on the bottom left of the page!

 

 

Enjoy the read!

Namaste,

 

 

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Celebrating Why I Love Yoga – on International Yoga Day

 

As I write this, I am reminiscing about the yoga class I was in just earlier and a wave of beautiful inner peace floods my cells.  There’s the obvious reasons why I adore yoga – I feel my practice in the aliveness of every cell of my body, and it brings me back to the present.  But, today, I was lying in my safe space of savasana, and a thought popped into my head:

“I wish I could bottle this feeling of pure, centred joy and wisdom,

and put it into words as to how to access this place.”

So, indeed, I can try – and I’m going to tell you why I love yoga on this International Yoga celebration day – but I know that it’s a space perhaps only accessible by you because this place – this home – is within; not without.  Please keep that in mind as you read; and yet, know there is nothing to do because it is already within!

 

Remembering The Inner Peace Within

If you’ve read my blog before, you’ll probably hear me talk about the ’power of thought’ quite a bit.  I am a big believer that our ‘thought’ creates our reality – and not in a forcing ‘positive thinking’ kind of way, but on a deeper level of understanding that our thoughts are just there, sitting on top of our clarity – which we can access at any time, just by being conscious of our thinking process.  Because of this, I also believe that all of the time, this ‘safe space’ I experienced in ‘savasana’ is already within us.  So – you could argue that we don’t even need yoga to fulfil that.  However – my love of the practice of yoga goes deeper than that.  Yoga is in my heart.  I enjoy the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of yoga and they resonate with my whole being.  So, on this day, as I revel in the blissful feeling, I know that that peaceful feeling is within me anyway, but I still enjoy the practice because it’s something I love – and it serves as a kind reminder to myself that the inner peace is just that: an inside-out job!  I follow the nice feeling.

 

Finding Space for Ourselves

Before today’s practice, I had been living in the illusion that I was ‘disconnected.’  I call this an illusion because it is a trick of the mind.  We are always connected – something which the ritual of saying ‘Namaste’ represents.  Just as I write this, it strikes me that some people might say ‘Namaste’ and not know what it means, and even think it is just something you say at the end of a yoga class – which is quite funny! Namaste means ‘we are one, we are connected.’  But, again, it wasn’t saying this at the end of class that reminded me of that – it was feeling it in the spaciousness.  You see, in the space we make for ourselves to drop out of our heads and into our hearts (something that yoga often provides for me because I love it – did I mention that?!), is where we find clarity.  When we are in the space of allowing our thinking to calm, we begin to see the underlying truth.

So, before I walked into yoga, I was under the illusion that I was separate, having watched as a group of friends had all been walking around hugging, holding hands and giggling together – in that moment, I had felt disconnected and invisible.  Now, it’s not the yoga that changed that separateness – though, being around people who were like myself, enjoying the yoga that connected us might have appeared to have settled my thinking because I resonated with others and wasn’t experiencing ‘separate’ thinking anymore!  It wasn’t the yoga that made me realise I wasn’t separate.  It was the space in my thinking that all of a sudden allowed me to gain an insight which literally popped into my head like an email in an inbox during savasana!  By the way – don’t believe anyone who tells you to ‘get rid of your thoughts in meditation: just not happening!  The insight, by the way, was about how I saw connection.

 

Insights into Feeling Connected

I realised that I had seen connection as the hand holding, the intense conversations and cuddling.  But, is this really the connection I wanted?  I am an independent person – I love cuddles, and deep conversations, but in that moment, I had actually preferred to be alone because I had a busy mind and I felt lost in it!  That was in that moment.  I also experienced the hand holding, the intense, cuddly conversations, but this day, I didn’t!  And that is ok.  It didn’t mean I was on the side lines; I was still connecting to myself and perhaps I just didn’t need that kind of connection right then.  Perhaps they did.  Perhaps I needed space.  Perhaps they didn’t.  I talk about ‘they’ as if there is still some sort of separation, though – so this is perhaps even still coming from the illusion in my mind of a separateness.  Because, the truth is, we are always connected.  Even in the total absence of physical contact, or even in the complete and utter silence.  The universe is love.  The universe is one.  We are just a human embodiment of the illusion of separate beings, working our way through life in thought, which can make us feel like we are disconnected at times.

Anyhow, without going too off topic, that was the insight that arrived on my mat!  I just want to reiterate that this insight did not come from yoga, but from within me.  However, had the physical human me – living a physical, human experience of life – not gone to yoga, I might have flooded my time with working, instead of space.  Perhaps, then, my insight might not have arrived in the same way because I was ‘in my head’ instead of in my body.  Or perhaps not.  It arrived as it arrived.  Yoga or no yoga.  There’s no analysis needed – it is what it is.

And so, I had a really beautiful time in a beautiful class – and that, my loves, is why I love yoga: the feeling I experience in the beautiful unfolding of wisdom, in the safe space of peace within myself, accessed through connecting to my heart. Enjoy your practice.

Namaste

 

 

 

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The Art of Letting Go: Why There is Nothing To Do

 

I breathe out, this morning, as I walk into change.  In this moment, it feels messy, uncomfortable, and there’s a tight sensation in my chest.  I feel abandoned, I feel the need to control and I feel agitated by people’s responses to my feelings, if indeed, I decide to share them.  It’s the experience of ‘letting go’ that feels difficult to me.  Some people love it; some people know that they thrive on it; I’ve always felt a struggle, though.  So, why does it feel this way?

 

Why We See What We See

The first thing I observe is that this feels like a pattern for me.  I always see ‘letting go’ as bad.  In the past I have gained insights about this in that my Dad would walk in and out of my life, and every time I would feel this as painful – naturally, right?  I learned to ‘think’ that he wouldn’t be coming back, and that I was unwanted, and that this was forever.  I applied meaning to my thinking, and then applied this thinking to everything that felt like an ‘ending.’  I coped with this by attempting to control and understand things.

What I didn’t realise was that this was an illusion of my mind.  Him leaving had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with him.  Not only that, but he knew no different, and there was no meaning in any of it, even though I tried to attach some.

Further, I attached the meaning I thought I’d found to everything else, in an attempt to control my being abandoned and hurt.  But this is all just the power of the mind.  Because, we are never separate, and we cannot be abandoned.  We are always connected – because, we are one spiritual being.  All that happens is that, whilst we are living in our human bodies, we gain the power of thought which allows us the capacity to think that we are disconnected and separate.  And we live in the feeling of this thinking, moment to moment, attaching meaning to things that just ‘are’.

 

Remembering We Live Moment to Moment

In an earlier moment, this new change felt exciting, and joyful.  I know that this will be the same in the next moment.  Because, living as a human experiencing life through ‘thought,’ our thinking changes moment to moment.  This is how we live.  We only ever have the moment we are in.

 

Change is Constant: There is Nothing to Let Go Of

Not only that, but this show how life is always evolving; it is an illusion that we are ever staying still in the first place.  If we are always moving forwards, then it is an illusion that we need to let go: if we are always evolving, there isn’t even anything to let go of in the first place.  We never had stillness to let go of.  There is only movement forwards and evolution.  And the truth in that, my dears, is infinite possibility!  It is exciting!

A wise person said to me once that “health is the ability to adapt,” and I believe this is true.  Because, as I say, we are in an ‘illusion’ that we are staying still in life, we are never ‘actually’ still.  There is a constant flux, a constant evolution.  At the point we believe we think we are stable, we feel stuck in this illusion, and our wellbeing becomes imbalanced.

 

It’s Just a Thought

Or we ‘think’ it does.  Really, we are never stuck.  We can drop this thinking and dance forwards, just by understanding the nature of what it is to be a human experiencing life through our thinking, moment to moment.  Remembering that we are always experiencing our feelings through our thinking really helps.

Take my example of feeling that it is a ‘struggle’ to ‘let go’, for example.  Once I remember that we are in constant flux, I realise the truth that we are always moving forwards and that there is nothing really to let go of.  It still feels real, but it makes sense that my ‘thinking’ is leading me to believe something that isn’t true.  Likewise, once I remember that my feeling of being abandoned is from my ‘thinking’ that I can even be abandoned, and that underneath that thinking, I know I am always connected because we are one, and that I only experience this because it is something I learned from early experience, I remember that this is an illusion too!

 

Still Feeling It: Rituals for Remembering the Truth

I can still feel the emotions that come up, but I can observe the nature of being human, and know that it is OK – I am OK – and it will pass, and eventually I will see the clarity.  There will be even deeper insights that I cannot wait to see.  In the meantime, I enjoy some rituals whilst I remember the truth.  I take some nice deep breaths – exhaling and inspiring, noticing how easily my natural breath intuitively remembers that there is nothing to change, but just function as needed in the moment.  Breath just breathes.  I follow the nice feelings of doing something I love – like burning sage and writing about my thoughts and feelings in my journal – and I just stay in this moment, knowing that soon I will realise the truth: that there is nothing to do, I am perfectly ok and that we are always evolving!

We are whole, connected and perfect – and there is infinite possibility because of the nature of evolution.  We are blessed with this truth!

 

Namaste,

 

 

 

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We’ve Made The List of Top 100 Lifestyle Blogs

We’re super excited to announce that Wellbeing Writer has made the Top 100 UK Lifestyle Blogs list!  This is the most comprehensive list of best UK Lifestyle blogs on the internet and we’re honoured that Feedspot has chosen us!

We are so glad you enjoy reading our wellbeing insights – and look forward to sharing our message further!

Namaste,

 

 

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Conversations about ‘Resilience’ with Charlotte Underwood

 

Tackling a Sensitive Subject with our Wisdom About Suicidal Feelings

 

The latest blog post is one about a serious mental health topic.   Written by Charlotte Underwood – a growing mental health advocate – on the topic of ‘resilience,’ our conversation evolved in such a way that we decided to use all of it to highlight some amazing insights from her journey.  What I love about Charlotte is that she speaks her truth from her relatable – and really, very bravely and vulnerably described – experience, and she has a goal of carving a world where the mental health stigma is no more.  She is really very inspiring!

So, with similar aims of wanting to people to see that they aren’t broken and that there is really nothing to ‘fix’, I wanted to offer some questions back to her, when we had this conversation, as to how I also saw her story – from a kind of ‘mentoring’ perspective – but bear in mind that this is just to hightlight that we are all capable of insights as the answers are within.  Dealing with suicidal feelings is not a light subject matter, and we’re by no means suggesting that it is easy to ‘snap out of’, because whilst you’re in it it can feel very real and scary.  But, we hope that these insights can help give hope, and help you see that we can dip in and out of our thinking and feeling in any moment, even when it feels dark; things are temporary and will pass – even when it doesn’t feel like it.

We have included both sides of the conversations so you can see the interweaving of different perspectives on the issues presented and help you make sense of the truth of how life really works.  I was a bit nervous as I really hoped Charlotte could see what I was trying to say, rather than seeing me as challenging her truth and being flippant – and she did – it turns out we are on the same page!   So, if you are suffering, firstly, you are not alone and we see you – the real, beautiful, whole and perfect you.  Please hear this as a story of hope.  Here is Charlotte’s beautiful writing, mixed with some of my own insights…  Enjoy the read!

 

Resilience: by Charlotte Underwood

Charlotte’s Insights:  What is ‘resilience’? The Oxford Dictionary defines it as “the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.” Honestly, I think that is darn beautiful and a noun that can be used to describe each and every one of us.

I can’t say that I have had an easy life; I’ve jumped many hurdles, survived many fires and danced in the face of fate. There are times when I’ve bathed in wreckless romance and times I have wanted to just end it all.  I am not sure I ever expected to make it past 20 – I thought I’d end it, or die from liver failure from all the substance abuse; yet here I am – at age 22 – stronger than ever.

Regardless of who we are, or what we have, all of us will end up feeling we are fighting a battle of sorts. The overwhelming plague of stress will seemingly swamp us all and, some of us, well – it’ll leave us worse for wear.  So, how do we stand up when we have fallen down and it seems our legs no longer work?

Nicole’s Insights: 

Pointing Back to Your Truth

I love that you see how very strong you are!  You have lived through some astounding things.  I wonder, if you consider how we are always living in our ‘thoughts’ about life, and that these create our feelings – for example – the feeling that we are ‘fighting a battle,’ whether some of this thinking might drop away?  I used to see myself as ‘fighting’ the world because of my struggles, but, you know – I recently heard something different…

The Universe Has a Plan

I heard that the universe has a plan for us if we can learn to trust it – and that we are already whole.  You might notice that the fact you felt you ‘struggled’ was OK because it led you to see the beautiful, strong, inspiring person you are today.  This is your truthful gift to the world, but it became visible to you – you became conscious of it – because of your feelings of struggle.  It felt overwhelming, at the time, when you were in it, but underneath that was the truthful, resilient being that you really are!  You are an inspiration to so many people; that is not struggle – that is the truth underneath the thinking that there is a ‘fight’ to fight. 

You are Perfect

This is who you were meant to be, and I wonder, therefore, if the battle is instead an illusion?  Does this make sense as I wanted to explain how I saw it in case if helped?  You are still standing – an inspiring, legs-still-working, beautiful, whole being.  It feels overwhelming in moments, but underneath the thinking that it is overwhelming, you are just perfect.

Charlotte’s Insights (continued):  Honestly, I do not have the answers, I do not know the cure and I am not sure there is one. Also, there is no reason to believe that we should completely ignore the thoughts inside our heads, as scary as they may be, they are part of us, they help us learn and grow; but we can tame them.

Nicole’s Insights: 

We Are Human – And Humans ‘Think’

I absolutely agree that our thoughts can be scary – and they are part of being human and like you say they are a constant source of learning!  I LOVE this wisdom, thank you! 

Do We Even Need ‘Fixing’?

Does there need to be a ‘cure’ or an ‘answer?’  I’m not sure we need one as much as anyone in society says we do because I think if we can just understand how life works, we will remember we are always OK underneath our ‘thoughts.’  Can we watch our thoughts, rolling through, knowing they are just thoughts?  Allowing the gentle unfolding of life?  Embracing the amazing creativity of our minds – even in their ability to create such horrible thoughts at times – even in our darkness can we see this as the astounding capacity we have to be creative?  Can we see how our thoughts impact our feelings, and know that some of these thoughts aren’t always truth?  Can we add a pause in between our thinking and our action, and see what clarity emerges underneath – like watching clouds in a blue sky clear to reveal the beautiful reality that we are always OK?

Charlotte’s Insights:  I remember April of 2014, I was months into losing my Father to suicide. I was lying in my bed, after a day which was neither good nor bad, and yet – all of a sudden – I had this feeling stirring in me; it couldn’t be ignored.  I kept thinking about the rector’s words at the funeral, that one day I will be reunited with my Father.  I felt so broken that I did not want to wait till my inevitable death – I just wanted to see my Dad; I wanted to hear his voice and have a hug, one more time.

I was in a sense of shock, a part of grief that manifested in a numb-like state, resulting in a lot of bad behaviour.  I felt like I had literally lost the will to live.  So, when I had this ‘voice’ in my head, telling me that life was not worth the pain and I would be happier at rest, I felt like I couldn’t push it away because I thought I wanted it.

I was tired; my body was going through so much – everyone was.  I called a few friends and no one answered – thought this was a ‘sign’ – that it was fate that on this night, I should end my life and all of this would be over.  How do you recover from that, I wondered?  The memories of lying in a hospital bed – watching the clock as if time was frozen – not knowing if I would live.  But I survived.

I thought – feared – that I would try again – I thought that my life might only end that way, in the hands of my own. But, I was wrong.  I am resiliant.  Today, I am sitting next to my husband as he sleeps, I have my dog on my lap and I am writing as I feel safe in a place that I call my home. I have a life that makes me content, and curious of my future: I am hopeful.

Nicole’s Insights: 

You Are Brave, Wise & Whole

Wow, this powerful felt experience had tears rolling down my eyes.  You are so brave and full of so much love.  I don’t know if you realise, but there is so much wisdom in here for the tender age of 22, that this just shows how resilient you really are!   One thing you need to know is that even though it felt like it at the time, you are never broken.  You only thought you were; underneath that thinking, was the ‘you’ that you were born as – perfectly whole. 

You Innately Knew You Were OK

Your description of it being a day that was ‘neither good nor bad’ is so interesting because I question whether it is our ‘thinking’ which can seem to determine a good or bad day?  Can it be a Good day with Bad thinking, and can it be a Bad day with Good thinking?  The fact that you had suicidal thinking and, yet, it wasn’t necessarily a bad day has a profound impact on my understanding of life through thought.  Underneath this convincing powerful thought that you needed to end things, you were still able to appreciate that you were actually OK enough to not be having a bad day. 

You Are a Creative Survivor

The felt experience of an impulse being really convincing can feel so real, and yet you saw that you survived it.  More than that, you ‘thought’ you might try again one day – and so you were perhaps fearful of a ‘relapse,’ because you believed your thinking.  Our minds are so creative.  And wow, isn’t that creativity a talent to be blessed with when used in your writing?

Home is Within You

The clarity, the real, underlying absolute truth is that in THIS moment, you are sitting next to your sleeping husband, you are with your beautiful dog, and you are safe.  Underneath all of your thinking, you are home.  And that, beautiful soul, is because ‘home’ is within you, not outside.  Underneath all of your thinking, that place you call ‘home’ – that settled feeling; it is all YOU.  You are the ‘hope.’  You are the ‘safe place,’ you are the ‘contentment.’  And, if it is all ‘within,’ you can know that it is ALWAYS THERE at any time, underneath those impulses and those thoughts. 

Charlotte’s Insights:  In a short time, I went from what felt like one side of a dark void into the brightest light of a life. It really felt like a heaven and hell comparison. It shows that life just does not stay in one place forever; good things do happen and life can be beautiful.

I can’t tell you the answers.  What I can say, though, is that strength can be found in all of us.  Learning to accept the past and not let it define you, understanding that problems are temporary and things do get better – that helps. Uncovering your purpose – like I have with writing – it can do wonders for remembering your resilience. It can remind you that you are a warrior and you are able to achieve whatever you dream – if only you stand up and keep trying, in this moment!

Nicole’s Insights:

It’s All Within

All of that – heaven, bright light, beauty, the perseverance and strength – is within you.  Even though the hell seems like it comes from you at times when you are experiencing dark thinking, it is just thought and not from the truthful you.

It Will Pass

I love how you see that the darkness passes, like it did before.  It can even pass in a second – we see things differently, moment to moment.  You sum this up beautifully in the explanation that things are temporary and always get better.  They already are better, underneath our thought that they aren’t. 

Your Dreams are the Truth

You writing is you, your warrior is you and your dreams are you – but they are not dreams; they are the truth.  So, stand up and ‘do’ – and know that nothing can stop you because you are already whole and complete – you are already all of your dreams!  You are resilience.

Charlotte’s Insights:  I love your comments, we are so similar and on the same wave length. It’s so beautiful when you meet someone who just understands you and wants to lift you up!

Nicole’s Insights:  Thank you, Charlotte, for sharing your story so perfectly.

Thank you for reading this.  Please reach out if this is something that you want to discuss further.  The truth is; you are always ok – even when you don’t feel it.  Trust us.

Namaste,

 

 

Charlotte and Nicole

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Latest Feature in Wellbeing Magazine: Reconnecting to Authenticity

 

Do you ever feel ‘stuck’ in your story?  I understand that, but let me reassure you that you aren’t!  Our latest feature appears in Wellbeing Magazine HERE and it explains all about why we aren’t our stories – and how we can see this by reconnecting to authenticity via understanding the nature of being a human experiencing life through thought.

A huge thanks to Wellbeing Magazine for helping spread our message – we hope you enjoy the read!

Click on the image below to head to read the article…  Enjoy lovelies!

If you enjoyed this, why not keep in the conversation on social media or by signing up to our ‘Wellbeing to your Inbox’?

Namaste,

 

 

 

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Using Essential Oils from a Place of Wisdom – Intuitive Aromatherapy

 

“No one can give away wisdom. A teacher can only lead you to it via words, hoping you will have the courage to look within yourself and find it inside your own consciousness.”

~ Sydney Banks

 

So many blogs out there offer advice about using aromatherapy blending – including my own!  I’ve written hundreds of tips for various publications about how to use essential oils, and these can be useful as a guide!  However, if you’ve been following my blog, you’ll know there’s a bit of a theme about tapping into your own wisdom and seeing the truth, in all areas of life!  This post is no different, and it explains how to use your own wisdom to create beautiful blends that will help you with whatever wellbeing issue you need to work on.

Sydney Banks sums up the essence of this advice quite well.  A teacher can only provide words, but it is you who has to find the courage, do the work and create your own experience of life as a human.  And, really, is there any work to do?  I’m not sure there is, because underneath all our thinking that we have to ‘work’ for anything good, there is goodness already within; there is a wisdom that we all have within us – an intuitive light – that we just have to remember to unravel…

Of course, we can’t just go pouring essential oils all over the place; there are cautions in using these powerful oils because they are natural chemicals, made from plant extracts that have therapeutic effects.  But, with a few handy hints, you can start using your oils at home safely and intuitively!

 

Research and Make Your Individualised Choices

Health is individualised and, when we research, we can make our own choices about what is best for us!  There are some great blogs out there where you can research tips on essential oils – there are some on here, some in our magazine features, and will be more to come in future, and I can also recommend www.baseformula.com and www.englisharomatherapist.com.  What I love to share, though, is that if you ‘think’ you can’t use essential oils easily, you’re wrong!  Health is individual, so just research and make sure you are comfortable with your choices, and get going!

 

Choose How to Use & Always Stick to Guidelines

There are many ways to use essential oils: in a diffuser, in a massage blend, in your bath, in a spritz – and many others!  The first rule of thumb, whatever your method is to stick to dilution guidelines.  I can’t emphasize how important this is because you cannot apply essential oils to the skin in their neat form.  These guidelines are there for a reason.  You can see more in an article I wrote for Base Formula here on Aromatherapy for Beginners, but generally, you don’t want to use more than a total of 6 drops (of a blend of 3 oils) in 15ml carrier in a massage oil, as a guide.  For diffusers try up to 6 drops in water, for the bath try up to 6 drops mixed in a cup of full fat milk, for a spritz, mix up to 30 drops in 100ml of hydrolat or water in a spray bottle.

Please note that if you’re using essential oils for the face, with children, with medical conditions, or in pregnancy (avoid unless you’ve spoken to a specialist) then there will be different (much more diluted) guidelines and maybe even certain oils to avoid, so consult your local Aromatherapist or GP – and read specialist advice from the above recommended blogs, which I trust!  You can also drop me an email and I’ll be happy to advise on your individual circumstances where possible.

 

Synergetic Blending with your Nose

Blending in aromatherapy is about getting a good synergy of oils that work well together chemically (as they all have different therapeutic properties) and smell good together!  However, I do believe that our bodies know what they need.  In my Aromatherapy treatments, I always get clients to ‘smell test’ which oils they like in order to make the final selection of oils.  I get them to choose 3 objectives and then pull out all the oils that are going to work well for those aims, and get them to see which ones they like the smell of – and it changes on a weekly basis.  You see, life evolves – we are in a constant state of flux, so the ones you need now, might not be the ones you need in a week.  That’s why it’s best to build up a range of oils, and then intuitively connect with the ones that you need.

 

Build Up a Selection

My advice is to buy a selection of oils you love the smell of, research what they are useful for, and I’ll bet that you find they fulfil the things you need help with.  Make a list of the sorts of uses each oil has, and then when you come to use them, you can pull out which oils might be useful for your objectives in that day.  The more choice you have, the better!

 

Allow the Process

You might find that you begin to overthink which oils you need if you read too much on them.  Thoughts are part of our experience as a human, and they are perfectly ok because they can’t really impact us.  Observe any thoughts that come up about what you feel you need in this moment, allow those thoughts to just be there.  Then, just follow your intuition.

 

The Choosing Ritual

If you like the idea, you can make the selection a little ritual.  I am of the opinion that we don’t need rituals to help us feel better, but that sometimes, if we connect with something, we can enjoy rituals – and so this idea pulls at my heart strings!  I’m envisioning getting a box of oils, sitting on a little cushion in the cosiness of my lounge, burning some beautiful sage, and connecting with my wisdom in order to select intuitively.  Make it your own little, special process.  You could meditate to create a grounded feeling first, if you so wish (I love that idea!).

Then, all that is left to do is to tap into your wisdom.  Follow your nose – see which oils you love in that moment, sniff them, and pull out 4 or 5 favourites.  Once you have these, see which oils smell nice together.  That will be your synergetic blend.

Simple, huh?  You’ve got this – the wisdom is innately within.  I hope these words lead you to that; have the courage to go within and enjoy your blending!

With love,

 

 

 

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How to Help Your Anxiety in an Instant

 

Firstly, let me introduce why I’ve posted this, by sharing this video I created with you…

 

 

You can resonate, right?  You’ve spent years thinking anxiety is just your ‘nature,’ living through horrendous panic attacks and heart palpitations, analysing everything and working out ‘what if’ that happens?  You’ve felt it in every cell of your body, perhaps being paralysed with fear and feeling trapped…  I know that feeling.  But I also know the feeling of the experience I have now that I’ve just dropped all of that.  I don’t need it – and neither do you!  What helped ‘fix’ me, you ask?  Nothing.  But stay with me, because you just need to hear something to help…

 

You Were Never Broken!

Of course, there were insights that helped me understand.  There were people who facilitated the understanding that helped me drop the anxious and panicky thinking.  I’m not trying to over-simplify and make light of this serious mental health challenge, because it absolutely doesn’t always feel easy to ‘just drop out of it.’  I had felt anxious for years, and even had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.  But, there is something profound that I want to share that, once you understand, can help lift away anything you no longer need – and when you hear it in the way you need to hear it, this understanding can help remind you of your true nature.  This understanding helped me drop my anxiety very quickly.   Though, nothing actually ‘fixed’ me because I wasn’t ever broken in the first place!  And you aren’t either – even if it feels like it; even through all of your experiences.

Anxiety is also something you can let go of in a very short time, if you pick up the understanding of what it is to be a conscious human being having an experiencing of life through thought.  It was understanding ‘how life really worked’ that helped me – and once I felt this in my body instead, I wasn’t anxious or panicky.  Of course, there are times I can drift back into it – as my thoughts about life go up and down and run into my experience.   The difference is, I now understand that this doesn’t mean I am labelled ‘anxious’: I am love, compassion, whole, and perfect and anxiety doesn’t fit into any of these – if I am feeling anxious, I am just experiencing anxious thinking in that moment, which will pass.

 

How Life Really Works: Creative Thinking

What you need to remember is that we are all bundles of energy moving through life, being guided by a greater force – whether you believe that to be nature, spirit, the divine, or just conscious energy – whatever it means to you.  When we were born as this energetic being, we were whole, perfect and just pure love.  Then, we were blessed with the creative power of thinking!

As soon as we started thinking, this started to shape our experience of life.  But, we mistook this to understand that our understanding of life was truth.  We believed every single thought we told ourselves, and we learned to feel how we feel based on how we think.  When we were comforted by a blanket as a baby, we believed it to be comforting us – but how can it?  The feelings of being settled were coming from within us – in our thinking that we were ok because of the blanket.

 

Wisdom Is All Innately Within

And so, we learned to live life like this, living in the feeling of our thoughts, until one day we were so in our heads that we forgot to come back out and see the underlying wisdom.  One day we thought that it was all becoming a bit too much, and we labelled ourselves anxious because we REALLY felt anxious, because we ‘thought’ we were anxious.  And we were in anxious thinking and feeling.  And maybe we searched far and wide for how to ‘fix’ that, looking externally for solutions.  But, we forgot, that not only does all of our ‘feeling settled’ come from within, but that underneath all of our thinking and feeling, is an innate wisdom coming from the space in us that isn’t crowded with thought.

 

You Are Always OK

You are still that perfectly whole, beautiful, loving soul you were born as.  Underneath years of thinking about thinking about thinking, and living in the experience of that thinking, you are absolutely fine.  Any thought that you are not fine is just a thought in the moment.  It still feels real – don’t get me wrong, I still feel my thinking and the aim isn’t to stop that – but the difference is, you are aware of it.  And just being aware of your thinking can help you settle, knowing that underneath that is pure beauty and love – accessible in any instance that you want to return home.

Personally, now that I’m aware of it, I see myself experiencing anxious thinking – and I laugh at it and say “oh look, there’s some anxious thinking. Full. Stop.”  It means nothing.  It is momentary.  It will pass.  In fact, it’s probably a great sign that you are super-creative with your thinking, like me.  So, sit in the feeling of it, knowing it isn’t the reality of your nature, knowing that you are experiencing life through your thinking in the moment.

 

Your real truth is absolute wholeness – and you are always ok!

 

If you want to continue the conversation, you can email me to talk one-to-one, or join me on social media for more insights!  It’d be lovely to connect.

Infinite love,

 

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

PS – watch out for my book on this subject in future!

PPS – I’m by no means suggesting you substitute your regular medical treatment for this insight, but it is something which I want to share because it really helped me, alongside many other things, including homeopathy.

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Supporting Grenfell Survivors – IFPA Feature

Our latest feature is one of true, heart-felt meaning.  We have been supporting a network called Completmentary Support Teams UK which was set up to support survivors of Grenfell Tower, and continues to respond to disasters nationwide.  This charity provides complementary therapy support for those who have experienced trauma, and this latest feature in IFPA’s In Essence explains more about the team’s progress.

 

With love,

 

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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Natural Health Magazine’s ‘guide to Aromatherapy’ Feature

We’ve been featured, along with Base Formula, in Natural Health Magazine’s May edition with our advice and guidance about how to start using Aromatherapy in everyday home life!  Here’s the article for you – enjoy the read!

 

 

With love,

 

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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Om-ing and Ah-ing: What if we Could Wear our Hearts on our Sleeves?

 

Why Positive Thinking Isn’t About Fixing Ourselves!

 

If you regularly read my blog or follow me on Instagram (@WellbeingWriter) or any other social networks, you’ll see that I love to talk about the power of thought.  I’m passionate about sharing my understanding of what the reality is around the nature of being human.  Once you understand how life works, nothing can take you away from the knowledge that you are whole and perfect, you see.

So, when I came across the beautiful company, OM&AH London, a little while ago, I just fell in love with their stunning products because they are in beautiful alignment with my own values.  Why do I love them so much, though?  Well, read on to see how this brand aligns so well with my own philosophy, and why I had to share this with you guys…

 

The Misunderstanding About Positive Thinking: You Aren’t Broken

Firstly, let me share my own views on ‘thought.’  The thing is, there is often a misunderstanding about ‘positive thinking’ – so often, I hear people talking about using affirmations, or attempting to ‘change thoughts’ in order to be happier.   Believe me, I’ve tried it – I spent years doing affirmations with really no clue as to why I felt nothing other than such a failure at it.  What I found out was that, actually, whilst some people may find it helpful, if misunderstood, it can also be suppressing our truth because if we aren’t feeling it, we can’t force it.  Trying to force positivity, is trying to ‘fix ourselves’.  But, in attempting to ‘fix’, we are forgetting something extremely important:

 

~ WE AREN’T BROKEN IN THE FIRST PLACE! ~

 

The Truth in our Hearts

This is so important.  So, you might wonder, if I have this view, why do I ADORE a range like Om&Ah London’s which charges people with such positive vibes?  Well, it’s not like I’m against positivity, that’s for sure; it’s just that I now understand the power of ‘human thought’ and what it is to be a human living in the feeling of our thinking in every second of time!  I know that our thinking varies moment-to-moment – and that it’s important to let this flow.  As well as this, our feelings and emotions are led by our thinking, and so, we can always be ‘up and down,’ dependent on what we are seeing.  And that’s ok – it’s fine to be up and down because if we just ride the wave, knowing that thoughts are transient, they will pass and we will eventually see our truth.

Underneath that ‘thinking in the moment,’ you see, is the truthful essence of our being.  That essence is that we are already whole and perfect.  This WHOLENESS is the TRUTH OF OUR BEING.  This PERFECTION is what is TRULY IN OUR HEARTS.  We just don’t always see it – and that’s ok!  We can feel how we feel in the moment, at any time, but what we need to remember is that underneath that, we are always totally perfect and innately well.  It’s not just positive thinking; it’s the truth.  We don’t need fixing because underneath all the thinking that we do – whether positive or negative – we are already whole at our core.

 

Wearing Our Hearts on Our Sleeves

So, you see, we are already whole – and, so, we don’t need to force our thinking about being positive.  We are already positive, even if we don’t see it in every second!  Underneath all of our thinking – even if we don’t always see our own beauty – our truth is always within our hearts.

So, why do I love Om&Ah London?  Well, it’s obvious, isn’t it?  With Om&Ah London’s stunning range, you can, quite literally, wear your heart on your sleeve.  Om&Ah represent the truth and authenticity of who we are.  Om&Ah’s products aren’t just ‘positive thinking’, they reinforce the underlying truth of who we are at our core: that goddess, that wild moon child, that kind, imperfectly-perfect being.  No matter what we think ‘in the moment’, we are always that truthful, beautiful, amazing being that is emblazoned across our chest.  With Om&Ah’s range, you can wear your heart wherever you like – on your clothing, your mug, or even a cute little cushion if you want to!

We don’t need to force it, because it’s the truth!  And, in wearing these reminders of our dear truthful hearts on our ‘sleeves,’ we can remind ourselves of that truth whenever we are mistakenly thinking that we are anything less than innately whole.

If you’ve not seen Om&Ah’s ethical range of amazing apparel and homeware, then check it out now here.  It’s a personal collection of compassion which really reminds you of the truth of who you are.

To celebrate this collaboration, the lovely people at Om&Ah London have offered my Wellbeing Writer subscribers an exclusive 10% discount across the whole store using the code WELLBEING10 (not to be used in conjection with any other offer).   They sure live by their truth: in a world where you can be anything, be kind, right?

I couldn’t connect to and resonate with a better brand!  What’s my favourite item from them?  Well, being the happy hippy soul I am at my core, I love my ‘Heart of a Hippie’ Tee (which I wear to do yoga, of course!)…  Enjoy.

Love,

 

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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Your Healthy Living Magazine Feature: Healthy Hair!

Our advice has been featured in Your Healthy Living Magazine‘s March 2018 edition, so head over to read all about how to naturally get glossy, healthy hair using essential oils – on page 18-20!

 

Enjoy the read!

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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How To: Make Aromatherapy Pulse Point Rollettes – a Base Formula Vlog!

We’ve recently been filming some Vlogs for Base Formula about ‘How To’ use essential oils.  This month’s feature is about how to use essential oil rollettes for pulse points so that you can use aromatherapy on the go, wherever you are!

Aromatherapy Rollettes are SO easy to create – and this video shows you exactly how to make your own.  Once they’re made, you can carry them around in your handbag or pocket and they’re always accessible.  What’s more, you can tailor the blends to your own needs.  Watch this video to understand more!

 

Enjoy blending! Much love,

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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How To: Develop Your Wellbeing Website

This is a little different from the usual wellbeing advice I usually give on my blog, but I recently reflected that I often get some really lovely comments about my website, which I’m so grateful for!  Being a Wellbeing Writer and wellbeing-industry marketing support service, I thought, therefore, that it would be nice to share where you can get your very own wellbeing-orientated site!

 

I only recommend things I think are really effective that I resonate with myself, and, as I really do love my website, and I have loved the simple and easy service my web company offer, I thought I’d share it for those of you who are after some help.  The company who design my website specialise in designing website for the health and wellbeing industry, you see!  I always recommend them to clients of mine who are looking for websites because they are so cost-effective and easy to use.  You just choose a layout, send them some images, and content (which is where I often come in, because I love crafting creative and engaging content for my clients) – and they sort all the technical stuff for you!

 

So, without further ado, here is the link to the designers, so you can get your own wellbeing website: click here to find out more!

 

Meanwhile, if you’re after some branding, marketing or content support, feel free to get in touch with me also!  Or, take a look at our Journalism and Press work and Consultancy pages to read more about our services!  I can advise on all aspects of branding and marketing for the wellbeing industry, and I look forward to helping.

 

Have a great week!

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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How To: Make Easy, Healthy Valentine’s Treats

That time of year has come – you either love it or you hate it: it’s Valentine’s Day!  Whether single or loved up, you can embrace this day of romance without all the hype and make it a day for wellbeing…  Celebrate your status – whether in a relationship or not – with our healthy Valentine’s treats!

Last year I wrote a blog for Base Formula on a self-love meditation.  This was one of my favourite ever blog posts, so PLEASE check it out.  For me, Valentine’s Day is also about celebrating loving yourself, so why not use it as a day to treat yourself, as well as (or instead of!) a loved one?  Check out my beautiful meditation techniques in the blog link to keep your wellbeing in balance!  However, today’s blog post is also pretty cool!  I am here to explain how to make some healthy love treats for this special day; again, whether you devour them yourself or share them with someone special – the choice is yours…

 

(As a side, before we begin, whilst I was making these, I chose to diffuse a lovely blend of

3 drops Rose essential oil, with 2 drops Sweet Orange and 2 drops Lavender

to really concentrate on being mindful whilst I enjoyed the process).

 

Chocolate; everyone loves it, right?  And research says that it can be good for you in the right quantities, and the right cocoa %.  This weekend I made some raw cacoa treats that are just perfect for Valentine’s.  I learned the skills from the beautiful Sally Sisson who runs Cacao workshops in Derbyshire here.  Now, I’m known for my total and utter lack of ability to cook – I am AWFUL.  It’s a standing joke among my family and friends that I can cook up Aromatherapy products, but when it comes to cooking I’m just a disaster!  Needless to say, Sally was a little nervous letting me measure out the ingredients, and kept a watchful eye on me.  However, I easily managed to repeat the recipe at home so I have to say, they really are simple to make – and so yummy!

 

Make it a Spiritual Cacao Valentine’s Experience

When I was in Bali learning yoga we overheared a young couple saying “oh, that chocolate was such a spiritual experience” – we giggled.  Our naivety, heh, because, apparently, it actually is!  The interesting thing about cacao treats is that cacao is said to be spiritual.  It is traditionally used in ceremonies, as a heart-opener, to unlock euphoric states, release pent up emotion and connect to the pure heart for transformation.  It is said to help connect us to universal love (though that’s already in, but we like the excuse to eat chocolate); so, what other day best to celebrate with cacao than Valentine’s?

So, how do we do it?  Well, don’t worry – that’s what I’m here to tell you!  This Valentine’s, try some delicious Rosy Coconut Cacao Bliss Bites with this recipe here: 

 

1. Coconut Base

Ingredients:

  • 200g creamed coconut
  • 150g dessicated coconut
  • 6tbps coconut oil
  • 1tsp vanilla extract
  • 3tbsp honey or other natural sweetner
  • 3 tbsp water
  • 1 handful freeze dried strawberries

Method:

  1. Warm creamed coconut and coconut oil in a double boiler system (with a bowl over a pan of water) until it is fully melted and combined.
  2. Add vanilla extract, honey and water, and mix well.
  3. Place dessicated coconut in a bowl and pour over the mixture, adding the freeze dried strawberries and stir well
  4. Spoon mixture into a lined tray, pushing it down.  Cover and refrigerate.
  5. Once set, cut into pieces.

 

 

In the meantime, make the following:

 

2. Raw Chocolate:

Ingredients:

  • 50g raw cacao powder
  • 70g raw cacao butter
  • 2 tbsp natural sweetner (honey, maple syrup, date syrup)
  • natural flavouring (orange zest, vanilla, caramel, mint)

Method:

  1. gently melt the cacao butter in a double boiler system (bowl in a pan over hot water)
  2. remove this from the heat once melted and stir in the cacao powder, natural sweetner and natural flavouring
  3. use to coat the above Coconut Base

 

3. Rosy Coconut Cacao Bliss Bites 

To complete the make-up of the beautiful Valentine’s treats, sprinkle the cacao-covered-coconut bites in a topping of your choice.  I chose beautiful edible rose petals, because rose, again, symbolises love – and in its true form its the emotional heart-opening essential oil!  Leave them to set, and hey presto – they’re done!

You can see mine here – surrounded by other beautiful raw cacao treats from Sally’s course here on the right!

 

 

Now comes the difficult choice – eat them yourself, or gift them to someone?!  Enjoy your own little bit of cacao ceremony this Valentine’s – why not even make the eating process as a mini mindfulness ceremony of love?  Remember, self-love is important too!  Enjoy…

 

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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Reiki tutorial: What, When, Why & How?

Looking for a Reiki Tutorial?  You’ve found it… We love Reiki!  In fact, we teach it, and we love sharing it about! So, don’t miss our latest vlog explaining all about it – and get practicing!

We recommend burning some white sage round the room to cleanse your space, as you listen away and then give yourself a good self-treatment practice!

See our YouTube channel here:

 

Enjoy, with love from us!

Namaste,

 

 

Nicole Barton – Wellbeing Writer

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